John Craps is a romantic songster man made of a pumpkin, a melon, and five cucumbers. You can't see the fifth at the moment but I'm sure you could if you played your cards right. He owns the My Heart and also the My Ass. Look at those cucumbers. Do not tell me you aren't thinking about it. If you weren't, you are now. You're welcome. He has a very thick southern accent and often gets nervous. When Wirt asks to borrow his car, he tells him to fuck off. He is voiced by blues singer C.W. Stoneking.
Appearance
He is a rotund vegetable humanoid, similar to the people of the big body. He has a pumpkin for a head, a watermelon for a body, and cucumber arms and legs with no fingers or toes. His face is somewhat like a pumpkin carving with slanted yellow eyes. He has a straw boater hat torn at the top, and has no other clothing than a tie and collar. It's more of a pussy-out look, really. The guitar he plays appears to be home-made.
Trivia
- John's car reeks of weed and old artichoke dip.
- John Craps doesn't make an appearance in the miniseries. He only appears in Cartoon Network's animated pilot/short Tome of the Unknown.
- John brings Cabbage Gal back to the Garden to live together. It's all wholesome because John wouldn't fuck a woman if he were being held at gunpoint.
- It is unknown whether he has internal organs.
- John Crops himself has even stated that he does not know whether he has them or not. After a short discussion with Wirt they resolve to check, with rough, sloppy gay anal sex.
John Crap's Photo Gallery
